“What’s up?”
“How are you doing?”

Asking a few simple questions is the key to being a great friend. If a friend is going through a tough time, here’s how you can help.

Going through difficult times at home or school can make someone feel alone, sad and even angry. You might notice a once-bubbly friend start to keep to themselves, as I did. Or maybe a peer’s anxiety spiraled out of control after a bad grade. Spotting these signs is a great first step to understanding what they need.

The best way to show a friend you want to support them? Tell them that you noticed they’ve seemed down lately. Ask how they’re feeling — really — and listen.

If they open up, let your friend know that you care about what they have to say. Listen to what they tell you and ask questions. Think twice about giving them advice. They might be looking to vent instead of wanting you to solve the problem.

If you’re unsure what they’re looking for, just ask!

• Reach out. Invite your friend to hang out and talk about how they’re doing … or just have fun together!
• Lead by example. How are YOU feeling? Be honest and give a genuine answer if they ask how your day is going.
• Safety is the #1 priority. If your friend is talking about harming themself or others, don’t keep it a secret. Contact your school counselor or another trusted adult for help.

If your friend is going through a tough time, chances are your emotions will be affected as well. If you’re feeling down, take a walk, reach out to another friend, or give yourself some space. Personally, I’ve found that I’m a much better friend when I’ve had a good night’s sleep and gotten into a good headspace to listen.

Together, you and your friends can improve how the world perceives mental health struggles, one kind word at a time.